“Self Control,” Frank Ocean

Car rides back to my parents’ home in northern Virginia after long nights out in the city have become so sacred to me, and Frank Ocean’s “Self Control” is my go-to accompaniment while I’m zooming around the frontiers of my hometown. The song itself feels a lot like the transition from August to September, from holding onto the sparkling illusions of summertime while you still can to ushering in the sobering anticipation of a new season.

“La Lune,” King Krule

So your ego fades along with the night, and you’re now merely a few hours away from approaching a new day. You want the night to stay just a little longer, so you turn on King Krule’s “La Lune.” You’ve never known such peace.

“Slow Dance,” Widowspeak

This recently came on shuffle during a late-night commute home across Brooklyn. July’s chaos had me doubting just about every decision I’ve ever made, but I found almost-solace in nights out with friends, when the summer heat cooled to almost-bearable temperatures and the outside world almost fell away. I’d never listened closely to this song before one of those nights, and the lyrics felt like they were written to me:

“The dance ends, you go home to sleep
The moment was never yours to keep
When you wake, the feeling will be gone
The world has moved on
But you know you were loved
Let that be enough”

“Ribs,” Lorde

This song defined a micro-generation!!!!! It’s a going-home-from-the-party anthem. Going home from parties is a sacred space for me; it can be almost as integral to the night as the party itself. Leaving the party makes me think about the passage of time but also makes me feel so present; it captures the simultaneous disappointment and bliss of growing up.

“Drew Barrymore,” SZA

WHY IS IT SO HARD TO ACCEPT THE PARTY IS OVER? 

“Funeral,” Phoebe Bridgers

While I’m a naturally extroverted person, there’s nothing I value more than the moments between that allow me space to myself. “Funeral” immediately transports me there, which is why I love it post-party. It’s somber and reflective, the exact antithesis of party culture. It helps me decompress after a night of being “on.”

“Sweet Disposition,” Temper Trap

“Sweet Disposition” is for the nights you can’t stop saying, “Tonight is gonna be a movie.” You’re already romanticizing your night before the party even begins. Flash forward to your drive home—you’re sitting in the backseat of a cab, head out the window, hair blowing in the warm city air. You can’t help but think how lucky you are to be alive and having this moment. Cheesy? Absolutely. Fun and sentimental anyway? No question.

“Teenage Headache Dreams,” Ellie Rowsell, Mura Masa, and Wolf Alice

The cool breeze of stepping out into the night hits your face—that’s what the start of this song always felt like to me. This came out past the time when I was a teenager, which may be a good thing, because who knows if I would have found it with my limited access to music back in the day. It has a great tempo for the pace of exiting the party and getting to transportation. The changes in style throughout are perfect for that post-event emotional contemplation.

“Close to Me,” The Cure

There are always those parties where you can develop those sweet crushes that may go nowhere or may change your life. Either way, I’ve left many parties and put this on repeat to satisfy the romantic in my head. The hard, constant beat and cutesy synth keys are perfect for dancing half-drunk with yourself down the dirty, dark street, scaring the hell out of rats and probably other more normal and sober people. 

“Slip Away,” Perfume Genius

I always found it kind of odd that this song plays in the party scene of the movie Booksmart. It works for the scene, but this has always been more of a post- or pre-party song. Miguel de Laveaga, who also writes for COPY, has said that this song is “like running through Manhattan in the pouring rain, the lights through scaffolding flashing by, and the colors of the delis and cars blur.” It’s for when the party is not what you ended up wanting and you just have to escape. A song made to break free.